Like a lot of people, I was a person who shared almost every detail of my private life and believed a question asked warrants an answer, a fast and honest answer. This has caused me sadness, betrayal, embarrassment, and regrets.
In a quest to be understood, victorious, or pitied/ the life of the party, or a person with ideas that matter- our lose-lipped tongues spurt out our private lives and dirty laundry like it was the hottest news. Only to realize that what was once a whisper or a “Promise don’t tell anyone-secret” later turned into fifty versions. The effects of which damage our reputation, self-esteem, self-worth. (unless it was good news).
It’s a bitter pill to swallow, a lesson in life that some of us sadly have to go through. It’s not a one-way street, gossip can indeed be interesting, but other than the assumptions and judgments of others which can be questionable- One’s personal life should be just that – PERSONAL.
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Why you should keep things private?
- Your personal choices do not need the approval of others
- You don’t need someone else to pick apart your flaws and personal decisions
- You don’t need to be subjected to unwanted opinions on your life & the people around you
- One thing you’ll see by keeping your privacy is how little you’ll start caring about others’ opinions
- You don’t need to reveal everything- TMI- Too much information causes a lot of problems
- There is also considerably less drama
- Not everyone cares about your pain
- Others have hidden intentions
- Your business is no one else’s business
Although everyone tells someone something. What you share and with whom you choose to share it, is in your control.
If you have to talk to more than three people about the same problem, you don’t want help, you want Attention.
Who are your friends?
If your gonna kiss and tell do so with care
Pick your confidants carefully not everyone is your friend. A friend today can be an enemy tomorrow. This alone is reason enough to keep your life private
Different friends for different purposes. This means that your co-worker who talks about her private life could easily talk about yours. Choose your friends wisely, Assess the situation and ask yourself: Is he or she really as trustworthy as I think they are?
Skimp On the Details Your friends may know who you’re dating, but they shouldn’t have a clue what you guys are doing intimately. Sharing your secrets is one thing, but sharing your partner’s is crossing a line you’ll wish you hadn’t.
Can they help solve your problem? Sometimes we do need a shoulder to cry on but you have to ask yourself, can this friend really help solve your problem or will this cause more trouble in the end?
Benefits of keeping your life private
- You will not owe anyone any explanation- exposing your personal life gives everyone a front-row seat to your life and invites opinions. Living a private life, gets you to keep your business to yourself.
- Peaceful mind- Privacy removes the stress for validation from others, and you no longer care what people think of your life since they don’t know anything about it.
- Safety- A private life is a happy life and also a safe life. the less you share about your day online, the safer you’ll be. It’s easier than ever for stalkers, identity thieves, and hackers to threaten people’s lives with all the info they freely share every day.
- Better relationships- Privacy gives you a chance to focus on what really matters. It’s better to share and connect with a few people who genuinely care.
Living a private life does not mean you should push people away, never open up about anything, or be isolated. Although, some people will be offended when they realize you are unwilling to open up about your personal life. Being a private person is okay, your life is your business, and only you should decide how much of yourself you are willing to share with others.
Keeping your life private gives you a chance to talk about other things that can inspire you. It enables you to practice listening empathically to others while drawing that line of respect.
Another great read: NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF GIVING YOURSELF PERMISSION