Chasing happiness

How to find the breeding ground of happiness

In a lot of deep conversations, it’s not uncommon for someone to say that they have yet to find happiness in their life. Most of us have lived the entirety of our lives in constant pursuit of what’s next, what’s the ideal, never truly indulging in the simple pleasure of what we already have right here, right now.

Indeed, happiness is quite difficult to define. The definition of it varies from person to person and most of us are in this pursuit of happiness, never really being fully satisfied.

Perhaps that’s because modern society conditions us to believe that happiness is a destination we arrive at: the solution to all our problems. It’s the idea that: “When X happens, then I’ll be happy.”

The Chase for Happiness

The chase is making people unhappy and anxious. It’s making people overwhelmed with the sense of pressure that they have to be happy.

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But what is the true definition of happiness?

According to Buddhist psychologist Jack Kornfield “Happiness has lots of meanings. We’re happy if there’s safety and security in our life, and we’re happy in the deepest way when we feel a sense of belonging and connection with one another, and with the beautiful world around us. We’re happy if we have a sense of purpose and meaning; we’re happy if we can learn to tend our own hearts and mind in a way that brings inner well-being and peace and joy amidst the vicissitudes of life.”

The Breeding Ground

Happiness is not life’s goal, its life’s fuel

To be clear, in life, there is no state of absolute joy or even absolute justice. Happiness and wellbeing have nothing to do with how well you think you’re doing, how far into the journey you are, or the success that you’ve achieved so far.

Instead, it has everything to do with the present, where you are in your life right now, and what you have at this moment. It’s a deeper sense of well-being and an appreciation for life itself.

In essence, it is deep-rooted contentment that you carry with you everywhere you go, a state of mind and in many cases a conscious mental choice.

Chasing happiness in the workplace

Top 3 Myths about Happiness

ideas noted from an article in Psychology Today

Myth 1: Happiness and Negativity cannot co-exist

Fact: Happiness is living the full human experience

The good and the bad, the positive and the negative, play a vital role in your mindset and ability to thrive. You will never appreciate life as much as when you live the full human experience.

Myth 2: In order to be happy you have to be successful

Fact: Happiness is the source of success

If your mindset is focused on negativity, then everything around you will just be a dead end. You unconsciously shut down every opportunity. A positive mindset, on the other hand, is open to possibilities, induces desire, determination, and faith which is a recipe for success.

Myth 3: There is only one formula for happiness.

Fact: There are no rules when it comes to happiness

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We all live different lives, we all have different goals and dreams – There are no rules to happiness, happiness depends on how you define it.

Happy Family contented with life

If you want to be happy, you need to stop chasing happiness. The problem with chasing after things that we think make us happy is essentially what’s making us unhappy. In fact, most of the time the perfect picture we create in our mind isn’t truly what brings a sense of fulfillment.

You will find that most of the people you meet who are truly happy are not the ones who have achieved the epitome of success and built comfortable lives for themselves.

They are the people who have found peace and have learned to appreciate what they have here and now. They are those who found a purpose – something bigger than themselves. They are those who have decided to live their life to the fullest despite all hindrances.

Your Happiness Guide

It doesn’t take much to be happy: Practice being present, write down what you’re grateful for every morning, be accepting of whatever happens, and do something every day that brings joy to your heart.

  1. Be grateful
  2. Shift your perspective
  3. Stay present
  4.  Let go of unrealistic expectations about how happy you’re supposed to be.
  5. Find the peace of accepting what is but know you can do more.
  6. Savor great moments
  7. Stop comparing and decide what you really want to do
  8. Make a difference in your life by taking baby steps daily
  9. Separate your happiness from your achievements
  10. Get out of your comfort zone
  11. Take care of yourself- a fit mind equals a fit body and a bountiful life
  12. Be honest with yourself

Happy Brain Chemicals

Do you know that our brain releases a healthy concoction of brain chemicals when stimulated?

  • Dopamine is associated with pleasurable sensations, along with learning, memory, motor system function, and more.
  • Serotonin helps regulate your mood as well as your sleep, appetite, digestion, learning ability, and memory.
  • Oxytocin. Often called the “love hormone,” can help promote trust, empathy, and bonding in relationships, and oxytocin levels generally increase with physical affection like kissing, cuddling, and sex.
  • Endorphins are your body’s natural pain reliever, which your body produces in response to stress or discomfort. Endorphin levels also tend to increase when you engage in reward-producing activities, such as eating, working out, or having sex.




  • Reply Aditi Jain July 18, 2021 at 9:10 am

    I love how you debunked the myths. Especially the success and happiness part. There is no y in happiness. It takes time to be happy and get comfortable with that feeling

  • Reply Jeannie July 18, 2021 at 9:34 am

    Great read! And I love your happiness guide. Trying to be a minimalist helps me to be more happy and contented.

    • Reply Lani July 19, 2021 at 12:06 am

      Hi Jeannie,

      Thanks for your wonderful comment. I’m glad you enjoyed the happiness guide. I agree with living a minimalist life the less clutter the better. You might want to check out my post on WHY LIFE BAGGAGE CAN RUIN YOUR FUTURE: TIME TO DECLUTTER. This would be perfect for your lifestyle.

  • Reply Chaos Queen July 21, 2021 at 7:48 am

    This is very informative and I love the idea that happiness is fuel! Absolutely true! Thanks so much for sharing! Very beneficial!

    • Reply Lani July 21, 2021 at 10:07 pm

      Hi Chaos Queen,

      Thanks so much for your insightful comment. Happiness is indeed our fuel to life. If you have stories to tell or enjoyed this post check out my other inspiring posts. I’m Looking forward to hearing more from you soon.

  • Reply Nancy Cozart July 21, 2021 at 7:58 am

    Great post! Very helpful!

    • Reply Lani July 21, 2021 at 10:06 pm

      Hi Nancy,

      Thanks so much for your wonderful comment.If you enjoyed this post check out my other inspiring posts. I’m Looking forward to hearing more from you soon.

  • Reply Mae Alexis July 21, 2021 at 8:41 am

    This is such a great article. I love that you also dive into the science aspect by discussing brain chemicals, and how they relate to happiness!

  • Reply Candice July 21, 2021 at 8:58 am

    Staying present is key! Great post! I love your keys to happiness❤️

    • Reply Lani July 21, 2021 at 10:01 pm

      Hi Candice,

      Staying present is indeed key. Thanks for reading this post, I hope the lessons and tips here will serve you well in the future.

  • Reply marvette critney July 21, 2021 at 9:32 am

    These were all wonderful tips. SELF love and finding what works for you is key

    • Reply Lani July 21, 2021 at 9:59 pm

      Hi Marvette,

      I absolutely agree with what you said. If you enjoyed this post check out my other inspiring posts. I’m Looking forward to hearing more from you soon.

  • Reply Trina Foreman July 21, 2021 at 11:11 am

    This is such a great article!!! It is refreshing and insightful, I enjoyed all three parts!!

    • Reply Lani July 21, 2021 at 9:58 pm

      Hi Trina,

      I’m glad you enjoyed this post. I hope you learned something new that would be beneficial to your overall happiness. If you enjoyed this post check out my other inspiring posts. I’m Looking forward to hearing more from you soon.

  • Reply samuel Oku July 24, 2021 at 4:46 pm

    I love this article so much!!! I was literaly siting outside reading and had to sit and stare for a bit while thinking

    • Reply Lani July 24, 2021 at 10:36 pm

      Hi Samuel,

      Thank you so much. I’m so glad you enjoyed reading it, I hope you got some new ideas. I humbly suggest to check out my other inspiring posts. I’m Looking forward to hearing more from you soon.

  • Reply Shelley July 25, 2021 at 9:03 am

    Great post! Self-care is so important. I recently published a post about self-care.
    Thank you for sharing.

    • Reply Lani July 26, 2021 at 8:51 am

      Hi Shelley,

      Thanks for stopping by. I’m glad this post resonated with you, seems like we’re on the same page. I will definitely check out your post. Thanks a lot.

  • Reply Joshua July 25, 2021 at 5:46 pm

    Great post! I liked the happiness guide.

    • Reply Lani July 26, 2021 at 8:49 am

      Hi Joshua,

      Thanks for reading my post. If you enjoyed this post check out my other inspiring posts. I’m Looking forward to hearing more from you soon.

  • Reply Cess July 25, 2021 at 8:07 pm

    Definitely enjoyed your keys of happiness! 💛

    • Reply Lani July 26, 2021 at 8:49 am

      Hi Cess,

      I’m glad you enjoyed this post. I hope you got something out of it. If you enjoyed this post check out my other inspiring posts. I’m Looking forward to hearing more from you soon.

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